What A Best Friend Can Mean 18 Year's Later

They year I began 6th grade we moved to Layton -- I was angry. I had friends where we were moving from, a routine that I loved -- everything was familiar. The new house wasn't ready before school started for the year so every morning my Dad would drive Mandy and me up to the he house to wait for the bus on his way to work. To make matters worse our classroom was outside in a portable classroom, the teach was weird and too bouncy. Everyone seemed to know everyone except me. To make matters worse about two weeks into the school year the popular girls formed a club called the "Pink Flamingo's". In case anyone is wondering no I was not popular I was more of a bookworm/chatty Cathy. I felt so lonely. Being a girl that age is hard -- I know I've watched five daughters go through this stage. It helps to have a best friend. Angela was in my class -- there were two of us. I didn't think we would ever click. Angela played tennis and was great in math. I have no skills in any type of sport what so ever but I could tell you the names of all the countries in Europe and Asia without the map being filled in. She was neat and orderly and I was (and still am) a bit of a hurricane. We eventually did click. I remember the first time I spent the night at her house -- my first friend since moving 40 miles away over five months before. Angela liked me for me. She was so cool -- she had her own room (I shared with Mandy still). Her little brother didn't touch her stuff and she had an older brother who could drive. Her parents were amazing and kind. I loved to go to her house because it was quiet, and organized. Angela had a German Shepard named Inga and this huge cat named Mac. We did everything together. In junior high we had several classes together, shared a locker and spent hours on the phone. For the life of me I couldn't figure out algebra -- I tried really hard and when I was bombing Angela was the one who tutored me and helped me with my homework. She could always find the bright spot. We had each other to tell our secrets to, talk over ideas, or deal with our families. For me things were rough at home -- my dad had taken a job traveling all over the world for and my mom was having a hard time with it. Then the bottom dropped out of Angela's world as her parents separated and later divorced. Looking back I didn't appreciate how hard that would be for her. Like everything Angela has every done she handled it with grace and poise. Hindsight is 20/20 and I have to say she was always there for me more than I was for her -- oh how I wish I had been less selfish. Time marched on and we went to High School. Again we shared a locker, and a couple of classes. The drama of beginning to date and crushes gone wrong. We talked a lot about what we thought we wanted for our lives and how we would never "settle". This year was our last full year together as she moved overseas with her mom and her new husband. Angela came home every summer, and sometimes mid year as well. During the summer she worked at a camp which cut into our time together. Our interests changed but we would still laugh and be silly together. I had my drivers licence and Angela didn't. It was cool then to "cruise the 'Vard". We went to Ogden and drove back and forth Ogden Blvd. for hours. I don't think I had laughed that hard in a long time. It was pure silliness and I loved every minute of my time with her. I hated for her to have to fly back. I called her several times that fall as my anxiety was beginning to be harder and harder to control -- (it would take me years to learn how to control it and to this day it is still something I struggle with from time to time). Boy were my parents ticked when the phone bill came with the three hour calls to Japan. I need someone I could talk to who I trusted. I'm not one to have a ton of close friends who know my most inner private thoughts. To this day I still only have a few close friends who I trust with me. At that time she was in a great private school having experiences that were amazing and I was dating some looser. After high school graduation Angela came home to work for the summer at the camp. I was working in a nursing home at night. I had met Charles that spring and we were engaged by the time she got home. I begged her to be my maid of honor and of course she was. I remember her telling me that I was crazy to get married -- She was right in some ways. That is one thing about Angela -- she is very grounded in reality. Before Charles and I were married she sat him down and had a chat with him. Angela loved me enough to let him know that I mattered to her. I remember later she told me "God help him if he hurts you". True to her word she flew down from college to be with me and save me from my mom. We were not getting married until five o'clock at night -- my mom woke me at five in the morning. By nine in the morning I need to get out of the house. I went and got Angela -- we went to breakfast. Later we picked up Charles and went to lunch. We drove back up to what would be our duplex and collapsed on the couches. Angela and I talked for most of the afternoon, as long as we could before I had to take her home to get ready and me to the church to get ready. Angela was there to help with my dress, flowers, and keep the anxiety at a minimum. Marriage, children and time changes things.... We would talk a couple times a year. When we got the girls she thought I was nuts and looking back -- I was. I wanted her to see that my chaos was okay and that I was okay. I was so proud of her and wanted her to be proud of me. Angela graduated from college first a bachelors degree, and eventually a doctorate. From what I understand she is tops in her field. We've drifted apart and at times I miss her something fierce. As my girls reached the 6th grade I understood the need for that special friend for each of them. It made my memories of her even more precious. I know the life changing impact of a best friend -- Angela blessed me with that. This weekend Angela married. I hope she found the one who will treat her as she should be treated. Who understands and knows her value, and what an incredible woman she is. Someday I hope to return the favor of the "God help him if he hurts you" speech. For now I wish her every joy and happiness.